Ever found yourself in the middle of a party, desperately looking for a zinger to lighten the mood? Or maybe you’re just scrolling through Instagram, hunting for that perfect caption thatâs cheeky but not creepy.
Look no further. These 200+ sexist jokes arenât here to offend â theyâre here to tickle your funny bone, poke fun at stereotypes, and remind us not to take life too seriously.
Weâve cooked up a gender-bending buffet of wordplay thatâs lighthearted, sassy, and safe for both sides of the aisle.
Whether you’re a feminist with a sense of humor or someone who appreciates a well-placed pun, these zingers are perfect for captions, convos, or travel tales that need a cheeky twist.
So buckle up, buttercup. These arenât your grandmaâs jokes â unless your grandmaâs hilarious, in which case… never mind.
đ€ Did You Know?
The word “hysteria” comes from the Greek word hystera, meaning uterus. Thatâs right â in ancient times, people believed only women could go âcrazy.â Which explains a lot about ancient medicine and why weâre joking about stereotypes instead of prescribing leeches.
Funny Sexist Puns Captions
- I told him to man up, so he bought a ladder
- She said she needed space, so I gave her the whole kitchen
- His egoâs so big, it pays rent in his mirror
- I wear the pants â he just irons them
- Heâs not wrong, heâs just… male
- She drives me crazy â and also parallel parks for me
- Real men donât cry â they just sulk louder
- Women multitask so well, we even listen while plotting
- He said heâd fix it â six months ago
- Sheâs not bossy, sheâs just mom-level efficient
- He thinks a throw pillow is a battle
- Women: solving problems men didnât know they had
- Men think GPS is optional â so is arriving
- I asked him to load the dishwasher, and he Googled âhowâ
- Her purse is a black hole â it holds snacks and grudges
- He said emotions are âextraâ â like guac
- I cook, clean, raise kids â he mows the lawn… once
Funny Sexist Puns One Liners
- Men marry women hoping they won’t change. Women marry men hoping they will
- Behind every successful man is a woman… rolling her eyes
- He said heâs a ânice guyâ â major red flag
- Sheâs late once, and itâs âmood swingsâ
- He thinks âdustâ is a design choice
- Sheâs high maintenance â like a Ferrari on fire
- He says, âI donât see genderâ â especially not in chores
- Iâd agree with you, but then weâd both be wrong
- Sheâs not dramatic â just accurate with volume
- He thinks âemotional intelligenceâ is a Marvel character
- Her mood swings have a fan club
- He thinks babysitting his own kid is charity
- Women plan the wedding. Men just show up
- He calls himself the man of the house â so cute
- She communicates with sighs, raised brows, and sarcasm
- He believes emotional support is handing you a beer
- Her â5-minute storyâ includes 27 emotional arcs
Short Funny Sexist Puns
- Men shop like ninjas â fast, clueless, and gone
- Women can multitask. Men can barely blink and chew
- He forgot her birthday… again
- She said “Iâm fine” â he shouldâve run
- Men and directions: still not friends
- Women remember everything. Literally. Everything
- He says âweâ when he means âyouâ
- She asked for honesty â and got ghosted
- His idea of cooking? Ordering Uber Eats
- She can hold a grudge like itâs designer
- He claims to be âlow maintenanceâ â lies
- Sheâs not clingy, sheâs thorough
- He thinks a load of laundry is five shirts
- She cried during an ad. He cried when Wi-Fi dropped
- He says he listens â then forgets your name
- Sheâs got receipts â both literal and emotional
- He wears socks with sandals â on purpose
Clever Sexist Puns for Instagram
- Caution: Contains estrogen and opinions
- Built-in GPS, also called âwomanâs intuitionâ
- Bearded, basic, and emotionally unavailable
- Coffee, contour, and crushing the patriarchy
- She believed she could â and then he explained it to her
- Allergic to commitment and common sense
- Running on spite and skincare
- Heâs tall, dark, and emotionally stunted
- Just a girl, standing in front of a man, correcting him
- Too glam to give a damn â unless itâs about dishes
- Men: simple software with outdated hardware
- Sheâs soft, but her sarcasm hits hard
- He thought PMS was a Wi-Fi password
- Wearing pink and tired of his nonsense
- I like my coffee how I like my men â quiet
- She breathes fire and organizes closets
- He has two moods: football and confused
Best Sexist-Themed Wordplay Jokes
- Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make sense
- Why donât women tell jokes at bars? Because men already think theyâre hysterical
- How do you confuse a man? Put him in a room with throw pillows
- Why did the woman cross the road? To escape another âHey girlâ
- Whatâs a manâs idea of housework? Lifting his feet when you vacuum
- How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One â he holds it while the world revolves around him
- Whatâs the male version of multitasking? Dropping his phone while chewing
- Why did she date an electrician? He sparked her interest and fixed the Wi-Fi
- What do you call a man who makes dinner? A legend
- Why donât men use bookmarks? Theyâre still amazed we read
- How can you tell if a manâs lying? His lips are moving
- What did she say to the silent treatment? âFinallyâ
- Whatâs a womanâs favorite workout? Carrying the emotional load
- Why do men love sports? Itâs the only time emotions are acceptable
- Whatâs the difference between a man and a cat? One listens when you talk
- What do you call a guy whoâs great at chores? Imaginary
- Why are women great CEOs? Because weâve been managing messes forever
Witty Sexist Puns for Social Media
- His side of the closet is a crime scene
- Her âIâm doneâ means three more rounds
- Heâs emotionally available â for naps
- She walked in, fixed your life, left
- He thinks âempathyâ is a skincare brand
- Sheâs got a PhD in petty
- He loves long walks â to the fridge
- Sheâs powered by caffeine and complaints
- He said âchillâ and nearly died
- Sheâs the Wi-Fi to your weak signal
- He ghosted, she glowed up
- Sheâs not moody, youâre just exhausting
- His love language? Silence
- She burns sage â and bridges
- He took initiative once. We still talk about it
- She asked for help. He disappeared
- Men love âlow effortâ like itâs a personality
Clean and Family-Friendly Sexist Jokes
- Why did dad put tape on the remote? So mom wouldnât change the channel
- Momâs cooking is love. Dadâs cooking is fire insurance
- What do dads and GPS have in common? They both say they âknow a shortcutâ
- Why do moms carry big purses? To fit everyoneâs problems
- Whatâs dadâs idea of laundry? Buying more socks
- Why do moms need coffee? Because kids exist
- Whatâs a dad jokeâs best friend? A momâs patience
- Why did dad go to the store for milk? We’re still waiting
- Mom says â5 more minutesâ and cleans the whole house
- Whatâs dadâs favorite tool? The remote
- Why are moms superheroes? Because naps are rare
- Why did dad bring a ladder? To reach his expectations
- Mom says âdonât touch thatâ â itâs now law
- Why are dads bad at texting? Because thumbs are optional
- Momâs hugs fix anything. Even bad Wi-Fi
- Why did dad check the car engine? Because mom said it sounded funny
- Momâs purse has snacks, tissues, and regret
Punny Sexist Quotes Thatâll Crack You Up
- âBehind every nagging woman is a man who didnât listen the first timeâ
- âMen are from Mars, women are from Targetâ
- âA manâs home is his castle â until she redecoratesâ
- âHe said heâd change. I assumed outfits, not personalitiesâ
- âSheâs high maintenance â like a classic car with sassâ
- âHeâs got two speeds: âWhat?â and âHuh?ââ
- âWomen want equal pay and equal Wi-Fi speedâ
- âMen donât read minds â just menusâ
- âShe multitasks. He microwavesâ
- âA womanâs silence is loud enoughâ
- âMen do laundry like itâs rocket scienceâ
- âSheâs sweet and salty â like revenge friesâ
- âHeâs got commitment issues with brunch plansâ
- âWomen plan a wedding. Men plan to survive itâ
- âHer lipstick says queen, her eyes say tiredâ
- âHe tries. Thatâs cuteâ
- âShe left a to-do list. He read the titleâ
Sexist Puns for Tourists and Travelers
- Traveling light â because he packed
- She brought 8 outfits. He forgot pants
- His idea of sightseeing? Hotel TV
- She booked the trip. He brought snacks
- He asked if Eiffel Tower was in Italy
- Her map sense = built-in GPS
- His passport pic is a cry for help
- She travels for food. He travels for Wi-Fi
- He lost the luggage. She lost patience
- She brought chargers for everything â even his mood
- He called the Leaning Tower âcrookedâ
- She researched culture. He Googled McDonald’s
- He said âno itineraryâ â chaos followed
- She wore heels to hike. Iconic
- He called the Louvre âoverratedâ
- She shops local. He buys fridge magnets
- He asked if Paris had Uber
Silly & Sassy Sexist Wordplay
- He says âyouâre overreactingâ â brave man
- She likes red flags. They match her lipstick
- He thought gaslighting was a candle brand
- Sheâs sweet till provoked
- He asked if she was on her period â rookie move
- She told him off with emojis
- He thinks ghosting is self-care
- Sheâs 10/10 with Wi-Fi and grudges
- He said âcalm downâ â she leveled up
- Sheâs emotionally fluent in four languages
- He says âdramaâ â she says âdetailsâ
- Sheâs 80% glitter, 20% rage
- He calls it nagging. She calls it reminding
- She said âIâm not madâ â but reordered his priorities
- He thinks emojis replace apologies
- Sheâs the plot twist he didnât expect
- He left her on read. She left the country
Iconic Sayings with a Sexist Twist
- âHell hath no fury like a woman told to relaxâ
- âSpeak softly and carry a designer bagâ
- âA clean house is a sign of a woman who delegatesâ
- âAsk for directions, lose your masculinityâ
- âA watched man never finds the ketchupâ
- âShe came, she saw, she made a listâ
- âHe who forgets her birthday sleeps on the couchâ
- âWhen sheâs quiet, he should worryâ
- âBehind every silent man is a woman texting paragraphsâ
- âEarly to bed, early to rise â still canât load the dishwasherâ
- âNo pain, no PMS jokesâ
- âHome is where the chores liveâ
- âTime heals all wounds â unless you said âcalm downââ
- âIn wine there is wisdom. In men, there is delayâ
- âShe believed she could â so she booked itâ
- âBetter late than forgetting her coffeeâ
- âCleanliness is next to her patience running outâ
Share-Worthy Sexist Puns for Every Mood
- Feeling cute, might correct him later
- Sassy today, sarcastic forever
- Tired of explaining â try Google
- Too pretty to argue, too smart not to
- I don’t argue â I just explain why I’m right
- Slaying sexism, one joke at a time
- Equal rights and equal eye rolls
- Making feminism funny since forever
- She believed, then double-checked
- Fluent in facts and facial expressions
- Raising standards and eyebrows
- Thatâs not attitude, itâs experience
- Equal pay, unequal patience
- I came, I saw, I organized
- Donât test me â I grade on a curve
- Bad hair day, good clapback
- Coffee, confidence, and not his opinion
FAQs
What are sexist jokes?
Sexist jokes play on gender stereotypes for humor. Ours are clean and light-hearted.
Are these jokes offensive?
Nope! They’re cheeky, not cruel. All in good fun and safe for most audiences.
Can I use these on Instagram?
Yes! Perfect for captions, bios, or reels with a wink and a laugh.
Are these jokes only about women?
Not at all. We poke fun at both sides â men and women are equally roasted.
Where else can I use these jokes?
Anywhere: travel blogs, parties, dating apps, or just for giggles with friends.
Conclusion
Whether youâre sipping tea, spilling it, or holding it in dramatic silence â these 200+ sexist jokes are your passport to pun-perfection.
Remember, the best kind of humor is the kind that unites us through laughter, not divides us.
Tag your bestie, share with your work wife, or surprise your boo with a zinger. Letâs keep laughing, captioning, and reminding the world that humor doesnât have to be harmful â it just has to be hilarious.